Thursday, March 15, 2012

Here be Dragons...

Do you believe in Dragons?

Dragons are real. But they don’t give a rat’s arse whether we believe in them or not. They don’t suddenly disappear if someone says, “I don’t believe in Dragons”, and we don’t have to clap to save their lives. You might be walking down the road, and walk past one without truly seeing them. I did that once. It was probably a mistake on their part, since when I looked again; it was just another plane flying through the sky. But I know it really was a Dragon.

They aren’t massively impressed with the Human race. We are, as they say, Crunchy and Taste Good With Ketchup. However, sometimes we can strike up conversations with them, and if we don’t irritate them too much, develop reasonably good relationships. I mean, you don’t want to push it too far. They don’t take too kindly to our silly sense of self-importance, and that frazzled hair looks doesn’t look good on anyone and smells bad to boot.

Traditionally they are meant to have large hoards of treasure, but to be honest, the ones I know tend to have, umm, collections of Tat. They like their shiny bits and pieces, and they probably do have some priceless artefacts in there, but you have to get through the piles of strange object d’arts first. (And don’t even ask about the MacDonald’s Happy Meal toy collections!)

Dragons are getting really old these days. Think really eccentric University Professor that might eat you if you piss them off. You have to stay on your toes to even be interesting enough to have a conversation with them. As to why you would want to have a conversation with them, they do have an extraordinary sharp insight on the universe as we know it, or more importantly as we don’t.

So if you ever have the pleasure of meeting a Dragon, then remember to treat them with respect. Bring something for them to add to their Hoard of Treasure (Obviously Disney Happy Meal toys work well. Or something from Regretsy, that will always crack them up!) Tread carefully and speak thoughtfully and you might find you have the time of your life.